Thursday, March 4, 2010

Hey Milton, you're an idiot. Shut up and leave us alone.

To Milton Bradley:

Oh dear.

I wanted to never speak of you again.

I've tried...my God I've tried.

But you just keep talking and talking and...

I don't hate you, though many people might think I do.

I think you are a very talented baseball player.

With that said, I never wanted you in Cubs uniform. I predicted, almost exactly, what would happen if the Cubs signed you.

But, look Milty, you are either a moron or you're delusional...either way, you just really need to keep your mouth shut.

What am I talking about, you ask?

So yesterday in a New York Times Baseball blog about you, Milton, you are quoted as saying the following...

“Two years ago, I played, and I was good,” Bradley said. “I go to Chicago, not good. I’ve been good my whole career. So, obviously, it was something with Chicago, not me.”

This is wrong on so many levels.

First...your numbers last year in Chicago, with the exception of 1 1/2 months were exactly what you had done during most of his career.

Second...two years ago were a DH. And you where good. As a fielder...um... You were not a good complete ballplayer.

Third...even if it was true that you didn't perform was well in Chicago as you had at the 52 other previous cities you played in, that isn't why the Cubs kicked you out of town and replaced you with an orca.

Fourth...It IS You!!! It's been you in every god-damned city you've ever played in. No one ever wants you back.

Fifth...you haven't been good your whole career...your stats the first two years you played in Cleveland sucked too...so there must have been something with that city as well. And you've had some other less than spectacular seasons too.

Milton...have fun in Seattle. I'm not sure what you will do up there when something doesn't go your way, because no one will really care what you have to say.

And, honestly Milton, if you would just leave us alone, we (except Paul Sullivan) will leave you alone. We paid you a shit load of money last year just so you could bitch and complain about us. I'm sorry if there were a couple of assholes that acted inappropriately around you...but almost every ballplayer has to deal with that at some point...even Ryan Theriot.

Good bye, Milton. Please don't make me have to talk about you again.

Love,
Doc